You know what - i think i've written about quite a bit of " scary " stuff on here. Depression, suicide, loneliness, heartbreak, lying, manipulation and selfishness. Thats some pretty scary shit right there, some stuff that i know other bloggers wouldnt even contemplate writing about. But back when i started this blog, thats primarily what it was for - it was a way of externalising all those things that were weighing me down. It really didnt matter to me whether anyone else read it or not ( although helpful comments were always appreciated ). So when i first saw the question posed in this prompt, i really didnt know what i could answer with. " I've done all the scary stuff - end question " ? And then it hit me...
Image from here
Revenge. Cold, hard, bitchin' revenge. I dont want to admit the feelings i'm having because to even think them makes me sick - what kind of person must i bet to feel this way? Doesn't even having these thoughts make me just as bad as she was? Or does it make me as bad as she said i am? But now here i am, going to admit them, in writing, for all of you to judge .... and thats scary. But you know what would be so satisfying to me? The " revenge " that would make me feel so much better about the way she treated me? What would make me feel like the "winner" ?Falling pregnant and having another beautiful baby before she does....
