Do you know how there are something things that you know, somewhere in the back of your head, kind of all vague and greyish, and then all of a sudden they just dawn on you ? Thats happened to me twice today. Those funny little moments of realisation where you take a mental step back and go " Really? No, seriously.... really ? "
1. The word " elaborate " as in " to elaborate on something " and the word " elaborate " as in " the room was very elaborate " are spelt the same way, but prounounced differently, and mean vaguely different things? Dont ask me i thought about that but let me tell you ... spin out!
2. My counsellor asked me how many more weeks i have left at work. When i replied that i only have 8 weeks left ( or 25 working days! ) it dawned on me that in 8 weeks i'll be stopping work because i'll be expecting a baby not long there after.
Of course i've been following along and counting weeks and everything like that but it just kind of hit me full force that in a bit less than 12 weeks ( or hopefully less ) i will be holding a new bubba in my arms, welcoming new life into our home and accepting full responsibility for that little life for the rest of mine. If the scans are correct and i do welcome a baby girl, i'll be gifted the reponsibility of raising a strong, self assured, ethical, smart, capable daughter into womanhood. I'll have to give her the strength to see through nasty bitchy bullshit, to ignore societies ideas of what is and isnt beautiful, and the confidence to see there will be plenty more fish in the sea. God knows there is no way i can ever shield her from those things, and nor would i want to - i want my daughter to be a girl, and then a woman, of grace and confidence, to know who she is and who she can be, even when she isnt quite sure of the whys or the hows.
So much to take on board, to ponder and plan, in the next 12 weeks. Or less. Heaven help this child should she decide to appear late!