A ( Baby ) Weight-y Issue

I think one thing all new mums struggle with is " Oh.My.God - how am i going to lose all this bloody baby weight?! ". I know, with Flynn, i was really laidback about it, i wasnt overly fussed about dropping all those excess kilos ( truth be told i didnt put on much weight really )... until i saw photos of myself when he was almost 1 year old.  I know they say that breastfeeding is supposed to make you shed all that baby weight you put on but its not entirely true - Flynn breastfeed sooooo much that i was hungry all the time, and i had actually put on more weight after his birth than i did when pregnant with him!

So this time around, i was careful with what i ate. I wasnt on a diet or anything, but i tried to moderate what i ate, instead of eating whole loaves of garlic bread for dinner. ( Yes. That really happened. My craving for garlic bread when pregnant with Flynn was so strong i would eat whole loaves for dinner. Or lunch. I must have been the worlds smelliest pregnant lady ). Anyhoo, so i tried to watch what i ate whilst pregnant and i'm trying to do the same now that Miss Tully has arrived and is breastfeeding like a champ. I am muchly proud to say that i have lost all the weight i had put on with her, and then some - however, though the numbers may be back to what they were, the body shape is not!

However, i digress - my point is, like anything to do with conceiving/being pregnant/new motherhood, its nice to have a bit of help. A few pointers on where to start. Which is what i discovered over at Karimums. I found a great little community, created by the same foundation who run Karitane clinics, which offers pregnancy and parenting advice for everybody - breastfeeding mums, formula feeding mums, mums of babies or toddlers, mums who had natural vaginal births and those who had caesars. Hell, i'm pretty sure, even though its called Kari-mums, they give advice to Kari-dads too! And what i found when exploring this great little online resource was a little infographic on pre-pregnancy nutrition. And who doesnt love an infographic, right?

[Source: Karimums. Real mums. Real expertise. Real support.]

Sure, its aimed at women trying to conceive but i think the principles are pretty sound for every woman, no matter what stage of the parenting game she's up to. I know that i've tried to take heed of its advice since i've read it and it seems to be working. Its keeping my body healthy and the community feel of the Karimum forums may just be keeping me sane and mentally healthy too!
( * Disclaimer - this post was prompted by an email from a media company. I have visited the aformentioned site/trialled aforementioned products. Any views/opinions expressed in this post are entirely my own )

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Winter Is...

.... the smell of wood heaters permeating the neighbourhood air.

.... cold and flu and croup and yucky, yucky germs.

....tracky-daks and ugg boots, curled up on the lounge with a good book.

....casseroles and curries slow-cooked over 8 hrs, tender meat and creamy sauces leaving you salivating for more.

....is Friday night and Sunday afternoon rugby league on tv. Or, my head in a book.

.... warm, cake-y desserts, dense and sweet, like the self-saucing caramel and apple pudding i made last night.

.... coats and scarves and boots and beanies to keep warm in.

....putting on flannelette pyjamas and snuggling into a bed warmed by electric blankets.

.... hiring a dvd and snuggling together under a blanket on rainy weekend afternoons.

What is winter to you?

Hubers Food & Wine Fair

If you are looking for a place to hang out on weekends, this might be worth checking out. In conjunction with the Straits Wine Company, Huber's Butchery at Dempsey is having an outdoor food and wine fair. Up for sampling are a selection of meats, cheeses and antipasto, with (they say perfect) wine pairings no less.

Wine. Cheese. My two favourite things :)

Event details
Date: 28 - 29th May, Sat & Sun
Time: 9.30am - 6pm
Location: Huber's Butchery, 18A Dempsey Road
Price: $25 (Full access for 1 day, rain or shine)

Get your tickets at Huber's Butchery or the Straits Wine Company.

Knives and Forks and (S)poons...

So - my normally voraciously appetited son went through a stage last month where no matter what i tried to give him for his dinner, it was being thrown off his plate ( or the spoon knocked from my hand ) and onto the floor. He went from being a baby who would eat pretty much anything to a squirming, screaming, messmaker who was refusing food he loved only the day before. Out of exasperation i started giving him a sandwich, some cheese and some fruit for his dinners, but i knew that the scrimping on the vegies couldnt last too long. To be quite frank, dinner time was doing my head in. Mick and I, being first time parents, had no idea what the bloody hell was happening but we sure as hell knew we needed to put a stop to it ASAP. So, as a first time parent, how do you figure this type of conundrum out? You ask your other, older, wiser mummies. And, thanks to my wonderful work colleague, "Aunty " J, we found a solution....we eat at the table, at the same time.

Mr Flynn, munching on a strawberry...

I know - you're reading this now going " uh...duh Amy! " and yes, in retrospect, it all seems so simple to me too. See, i was feeding Flynn on his own, and then Mick was giving him a bath while I cooked our dinner. Even though he was refusing his own food ( the same yummy chicken-and-rice, stir fries and spaghettis that he's always enjoyed ) Flynn would then happily totter over to us while we were eating and demanding stuff off our plates. I explained all this to J and she just looked at me and smiled and said " He's a big boy now - he wants to eat with you ". Doi! Of course he does! Flynns been able to say " big boy " for about a month now and has been doing all kinds of other " big boy " things, like bing allowed in Daddy's garage or being able to walk into the shops ( very slowly ) holding my hand.... of course he wanted to eat at the table with the grown ups. So that night i went home, cleared off the end of our dining table ( yes, we're guilty of eating in front of the tv watching "Neighbours" instead of using the table... ) and proceeded to cook dinner at a time suitable for us all to eat together. That was last Monday, and we've had a blissful week of Flynn eating most of his dinner and throwing none of it on the floor.

Most nights he's eaten the same meal as us ( except when its been a bit spicy ) and he's going really well. I give him a little bowl of stir fry ( for eg ) and he sits quite contentedly, picking up chunks of chicken and bits of vegies and gulping it all down with copious amounts of milk. I even gave him his own little plastic fork last night, just to see how he went...and he was stabbing the little chunks of meat like a total pro! You know, except that he holds the fork like a tiny caveman and has no table manners whatsoever... even better, Flynn even asked for more vegies! He'd picked out all the capsicum and beans in the bowl and was left only with chicken. When he saw me eating a bean he pointed and grunted and i asked him " Do you want some vegies? " and he points again and goes " bej- ees! ". So now, not only do i have a child who is eating his dinner without throwing it AND is interested in starting to learn to use forks and spoons ( or " poons " as he calls them ) but i have a 15 month old who wants more vegies.

Toddlers - they're so weird!

Friday Feast

So - i didnt have much of a response to my idea last week to start a Friday Feast link up. For anyone who missed it, i'd love to start a weekly link up where we contribute ( and thus exchange ) our favourite recipes, whether they be sweet or savoury, simple or gourmet. The budding chef in me would love to find more family and budget friendly recipes, but anything you like would be great! That being said, i didnt have many takers for the idea last week but that wont stop me starting it as a weekly post for myself. Who knows - perhaps it will evolve?

So, this week, i thought i'd start with one of my favourite quick, easy and fresh recipes: Sesame Crusted Salmon with Coleslaw.

Sesame Crusted Salmon With Coleslaw ( serves 2-4 )
* salmon fillets ( get one pieces for each person you'd like to serve )
* 1/2 cup of sesame seeds
* 1/2 small white cabbage, thinly sliced
* 1 large carrot, grated
* 2 sticks of celery, chopped finely

1. Putting the 1/2 cup sesame seeds on a small plate, coat both sides of each salmon fillet with seeds.
2. Heat a teaspoon of vegetable oil in frypan. Place salmon in, seeded side down.
3. Cook for 3- 4 minutes both sides ( or until cooked to your liking ).
4. In the meantime, mix chopped cabbage, grated carrot and chopped celery in large bowl.
5. ( This is where i alternate from time to time... ) Either dress coleslaw in store bought coleslaw dressing or mix 2 tablespoons of sweet chilli sauce with 1 tablespoon of lime juice, for a refreshing Asian style slaw.

And that be it - those proportions are all from memory. Because i only make this meal for Mick and myself, we usually end up with left over coleslaw for the next days lunch, but if you think you'll need more, than just up the amount of vegies by another half or so. Couldnt be easier!

Food For Thought

I know I’ve said this a few times but – I really feel like when I step on the scales at the end of this week I’m going to have PUT ON weight. I’ve had a bad week – no exercise, not enough of the right foods. I found myself amazed that I could have been so strict for those two weeks at the start because this past week I have caved in for all the wrong things. Flynn is too little too eat a full Freddo frog – oh hey I’ll just eat the other half! I couldn’t be bothered making up a salad – no matter, I’ll just eat two pieces of toast with peanut butter! Gee Subway is tempting – nah, I’ll have Hi-GI sushi instead! See what I mean – my head has totally been struggling with the right decisions this week.

Like last night – I ate the hugest piece of steak I’ve ever seen. They didn’t look that big when I bought them but looking at them on the George Foreman grill ( hey, at least I’m still knocking out the fat! ) they looked enormous. But did I cut in half and save some for lunch today? Umm, no, I just went right on eating that delicious side of cow. I’d feel better about it if it were a one-time slip up, but its not, and I’m worried that once I hit my goal I’m going to slip-slide right back to the “wrong” decisions. Like once I’ve hit my goal weight my mind will go “ Ah, we’ve reached the end! No need to try so hard anymore! “. Its sobering thought.

On the flipside, nor do I want to be one of these women who is obsessed by food, who knows exactly how many calories and how much fat is everything, and who is too afraid to indulge once in a while. A nice, normal, balance is what I’m aiming for – I guess the occasional bad week is all part of that. Right? Right?

Friday Feast

Am I the only strange person out there who enjoys the preparations for the weeks grocery shop? Let me explain - I do my weekly grocery shopping on a Friday morning. Just me and Flynny-boy. So, on a Thursday night i sit down with various cookbooks and food magazines and plan out the weeks menu, and write out an appropriate shopping list. I love pouring over the magazines, trying to find recipes that not only sound delicious but that are relatively healthy and that i can make on a budget. I check the ingredients list to see if it has a lot of pantry staples ( thus saving me money not having to buy heaps of ingredients i wont use regularly ) and for things i'm going to be cooking on the 3 days that i work i like to find meals that are relatively quick and easy to prepare. I really do enjoy it, even down to the 3 separate places i need to stop ( greengrocers, meat centre, supermarket ) to get the groceries done.

I also enjoy gathering new recipes that i can make for my family - hence the love of food magazines over cookbooks, and an affinity for the Taste website. So, my question to you loyal reader types is: would you be interested in sharing? I would love to start a " Friday Feast " link up, where we get to share our favourite recipes, whether they be sweet or savoury, and especially if they were budget recipes ( isnt everyone tight on money these days? ). Let me know in the comments if its something you would take part in and if i get enough takers everyone prepare for next week!

Wasted Weekend

I have a confession to make, ahead of next weeks Operation Slimdown update - i had a BAD weekend. As in everything was bad... i got upset, i lazed around the house like a sad sack, i didnt eat much but what i did eat was junk, and rather than water i crammed myself full of Pepsi Max. The only vegetables i ate on Sunday were mushrooms ( on a pizza ) and potato ( wedges, with a steak sandwich ). By Sunday evening i was a bit disgusted in myself - although my mood had cheered up somewhat, thanks to a series of very farty-sounding raspberries blown on my arm by Flynn ( farty sounds are funny! ). I'm not trying to make excuses by pre-empting my expected low weight loss for the fortnight with this post - i think i'm just trying to let myself know its ok to slip up. Especially when all you want to do is curl up in a ball and sob.

What was wrong with me, your wondering? In retrospect, i probably could have manned-up a bit and not gotten so terribly upset but..... my mum let slip to my sister that she will be bridesmaid at my wedding. Why is that so bad? Because I HADNT ASKED HER YET. I soooo wanted the whole asking thing to be a special moment between my sister and i - i had planned to invite her around for dinner and ask, and let her have her " wow - really? " moment.... but now i cant, because my mother quite oftens suffers from Mouth Before Brain Syndrome. That is, she doesnt think before she speaks. So, without thinking, my mother blurts out to my sister " Oh, Amy made the hair appointment for us the morning of the wedding ", which got a death stare from me and a " Why would i be getting my hair done with her ? " from my sister. Now, my sister may be blonde but she's not entirely stupid, so she knows that the only people who get their hair done with the bride are the brides mother.... and the bridesmaids. Light bulb comes on for my sister, my mothers brain engages at the same moment and she realises what she's done, and my death stare turns to evil eye with angry pout. Not.Happy. Mum.

Suffice to say i eventually burst into tears and had to be comforted by my dad, who assured me that although my mother has frequent brain farts like that, she never actually means to ruin or offend. So not the point though - my special moment is gone, my sisters is gone, and now i cant unask her, can i? ( Not that i wanted to, but there may be complications with the best man which would have made it easier to have no attendants at all. Too late now... ). So i spent the entirety of the rest of the weekend in a funk, alternately pouting and weeping, and paying no attention to what i was putting in my mouth. Boo hoo me....

Food, Glorious, Food!

I am so loving food right now. I'm loving cooking it, eating it, watching it being cooked on tv and i'm loving reading about it. I'm not loving it enough to get hugely, grossly fat though - so no worries about that. I'm just enjoying the rituals of food is all, and how it makes people come together and be happy. ( Most of the time - my failed attempt at soup last night didnt really make anyone happy ).

I sit down of a Friday evening and plan out a menu for the week - i go through my recipe magazines and very few cookbooks that i own and choose the recipes i'd like to make, and write out the weeks shopping list as i go. My mother always did it that way and i always thought she was a bit anal. But you know what? Its so much easier that way! No going to the freezer and/or fridge and going " Uh, what am i going to cook tonight ? " . No getting out your recipe only to find that you dont have any mushrooms/chicken stock/ peanuts ( or, you know, whatever ). I dont plan it down to the specific day though - i just ask Mick in the morning what he'd life for dinner, give him the options, and he usually says " Suprise me! ". Easy as that. This weeks menu includes a beef massamun curry that i'm really looking forward to and my first attempt at beer battered fish.

I'm also enjoying baking. I've baked something almost every week since Flynn has been born, just for that fun of it, and now that we're hosting mothers group at each others houses rather than going to a cafe there is even more incentive to whip up a yummy slice or some muffins. Plus, and i know this is a little big-headed, but i really like getting compliments on my cooking from the other mums. I made a slice a few weeks ago that got the thumbs up all round - i even got asked for the recipe! - and this weeks " Apple and Cream Cheese Friands " scored me a " gee you're a good cook! ". Big smiles from me! And i'm not a baking snob either - i'm totally happy to share my recipes. I know some people are all " oh no, its an old family recipe, i couldnt possibly share it with you " but most of mine come from magazines or http://www.taste.com.au/ so they aren't exactly a secret!

So, in the spirit of sharing, leave me a comment ( if you want ) with your favourite meal to cook, a link to a recipe, or to your favourite cooking website!

An Un-Mushy Update

This one is a little TMI, unless your a mumma, in which case its just a normal thing for you.

As i previously posted, my little Flynn started on " solids " last week. However, we've backed off the mush for a few days because, ahem, the little dude is " backed up". If you know what i mean. And if you dont - it means he hasnt pooped in over 6 days now. I knew that introducing solids messes with their little digestive systems for a while, and i was expected a little break in poop proceedings - but 6 days ? Holy schmoly! I've taken him to the doctor and he's been on little baby laxative drops and prune juice for 3 days but still nothing. I feel bad because i'm the one who's fed him the stuff thats blocked him up - my only consolation is he doesnt really seem to be in any pain, except after a feed. After a feed when his tummy is full he goes all red in the face and has a big. old, screaming cry. Mama doesnt like listening to that. It makes me feel bad. He had his 4 month vaccination needles today and i asked the nurse about his " problem " and she said its completely normal, just keep up the drops and the juice, and he has to pooh eventually.

We all do, right?

( Oh, and on an unrelated note, if you havent voted for me yet, head to Blog This! and vote for me in this week challenge.... voting ends tonight! )

Adventures in Mush and Toothy-Pegs

So.... i've started my little Flynn on rice cereal. He is almost 16 weeks and will be 4 months old going off birthdate on the 27th of this month. Which means that yes, i have started him on "solids " just shy of 4 months of age, which is the youngest age they should be ( at a minimum ) according to health recommendations. So anyone who wants to use the comments to tell me that " you cant start solids before 4 months! Midwives reckon you should wait til 6 months! " or something to that effect, feel free. I welcome debate in the comments section ( see my post entitled " I'm No Mummy Hater... " - mummy-debate galore! ). Basically it came down to this - my baby boy is getting increasingly hungry and by our second-to-last and last feeds of the night my booby juice is starting to almost run dry, which means Flynn is pulling himself off, after 40 minutes between boobies, and he's crying 'cause he's still hungry. I figured it was either top him up with formula and get him addicted - thus rejecting mummies milk and making her sad - or just starting him on one rice cereal feed a day, a week or two earlier than recommended. A boy has to eat right ?

Right. And so we've started ourselves on rice cereal. Mmm.... looks like mush and i'm pretty sure it probably tastes like soggy cardboard, but Flynny has taken to it pretty well. We've only had two nights on it so far - the first night i'm pretty sure most of it ended up on his bib and he thought the spoon was a bit weird, but last night he settled into it a bit better. In fact, when everything was gone out of the bowl and i popped the bowl up on the table ( he sits in his bouncer and i sit on the floor ), he turned his little head and kept staring at the bowl, as if magically trying to will it back. Clever little fella - only two nights of proper mush and he's already figured out mush comes from the bowl and the purple spoony thingo.

Also - i think my little dude is teething. He's pretty much the King of the Dribble-Guts anyway, but he's been extra dribbly, extra rosy-cheeked and extra snuggly the last few days. I'm loving the snuggles but i'm not enjoying the huge screams every now and then, especially when he's finished feeding ( apparently all that sucking makes the gums swell, or something, making them more sensitive ). I cant see any tell-tale lumps popping up yet but when i give him something to bite on or rub his gums for him he settles a bit. I gave him some baby Panadol last night to calm him down but i'm thinking i should get some gel or something when i'm next at the shops. I know my little man is in some kind of pain, but honestly - i'm just excited to see a tooth pop up!

Ah - my little man is growing so quickly! ( Cliche yes, but i have to acknowledge its truth - i want him to be a chubby cheeked bubba forever! )

Saving The Earth, One Romantic Dinner At A Time

So – I believe Earth Hour has been completed all over the world for another year. What is Earth Hour you ask? Well, for those of you who haven’t heard of it, Earth Hour is one designated hour, every year, where people across the globes are urged to go without electricity ( I mean, those of us who are lucky enough to have it in the first place ). That means, at the most basic level, turning off your lights but also the tv, computer, radio….anything that uses excess electricity and power, thus creating carbon ( or something. I’m not exactly a diligent greenie ). Turning off your lights, at the very least, is pretty damn easy, so its not like you need to go completely out of your way to do something right by the environment.


So how did I spend Earth Hour 2010 ? I decided, late Friday afternoon, that seeing as the idea was to spend an hour in the no-electricity-dark that I would make Mick and I a three course meal – to be eaten by candlelight of course! That’s right, I spent the time enjoying a cute, romantic dinner – that I cooked! – with my beautiful fiancé and my gorgeous chubby bubby. Actually, not true – the chubby bubby slept right the way through dinner and had the good manners to wait until we were finished before he woke up crying. Mick told me he loved the meal and I have to say, I didn’t do to badly. What did we feast on ?

Entrée: Prawn cocktail with fresh cucumber salad and lime aoli;
Main: Pasta Delicious – penne, chicken and broccoli in a cheese sauce;
Dessert: Raspberry, Peach and White Chocolate Mousse.

It all sounds terribly gourmet, but I promise you they were all very simple meals. Simple – and delicious! So we spent a good 40 minutes eating our meal and chatting over candlelight, laughing at our snoring son and hoping he didn’t think it was bed time for the night already. When he woke up, we spent the last 20ish minutes of the hour in our candlelit bedroom, still chatting whilst I breastfeed the now hungry chubby bubby. Once the lights were allowed to come back on it really was Flynns bedtime so we put him down for the night, watched “ Crocodile Dundee “ on telly and then took our goodselves off to bed. Overall, I cant think of a nicer way to spend an hour with no lights. Raunchier ways, perhaps, but nicer way, no….

I Wanna Be Like Mike...Umm, I Mean Martha

And by Martha, i mean Martha Stewart. See, since becoming a first-time, stay at home mum ( SAHM ) i've been watching a fair bit of day time tv. I've kept up with Dr Phil, Oprah, Ellen and the girls from the view, but i've also found a new found love for 'The Martha Stewart Show' and for the Australian version of 'Ready!Steady!Cook!' I've been drooling madly over all the delicious food they cook on these shows and then it gets to dinner time and i'm inspired to make something just awesome for Mick and myself - only i dont have the pantry stocked with fancy ingredients that Martha has. I dont do too badly - its not like i dish up the boring old meat-and-two-veg - but i cant just whip up some gorgeous fancy meal without some degree of preparation.

So as of grocery shopping this week i'm inspired to stock my cupboards and fridge with some cooking show basics: filo pastry, rock salt, bread crumbs, frozen berries, tumeric, paprika, soba noodles. You know, things like that. I mean, i already have mixed dried herbs, plain salt and 2 minute noodles, but they just dont cut it. If i have all that stuff then i can just pop on my favourite recipe website, www.taste.com.au, and find myself a meal to impress my fiance with every night, without having to drag poor Flynn to the supermarket when i only need to buy one or two items.

So tonight, bearing in mind that i dont yet have my fancy pantry set up, we'll be having barbecued lamb steaks topped with avocado and melted feta, accompanied by my mixed tzatziki salad concotion - cubed cucumber, red capsicum, cherry tomatoes and baby spinach covered in tzatziki dressing. Y-u-mmmmmmm......

Thinking Happy, Week 4

Hello again, and welcome to week 4 of Holly's " Operation Think Happy "! Just a reminder that this involves listing 7 things that have made you happy this week. Focus on the positives people!

1. The moment, #1 - I was in the middle of getting dinner ready last night when Flynn decided he wanted to have a grizzle, so Mick scooped him up and took him outside. After a few minutes i go to the door and out in our driveway, there they are - Mick lokking down at this little wrapped up bundle in his arms, chatting to him about God knows what. I just stood at the door, unseen and smiling.

2. The moment, #2 - A few hours later, i've finished feeding Flynn and he's lying back, all milk drunk.... but not taking his eyes off his daddy. Its like, even at 8 weeks old, Daddy is his hero. Too, too sweet.

3. Planning an engagement party - finally! We've been engaged since October but havent even thought about an engagement party yet. Its not going to be anything fancy, just a big bbq at my parents house, with family and friends.

4. Chocolate truffle balls - I stole this very simple recipe from Welfare Wisdom and completely loved it! Basically get a packet of your favourite biscuits ( like Caramel Tim Tams for me, or it could be Oreos, Mint Slice etc ), blend them into crumbs, mix with cream cheese, chill, roll into balls and then cover with melted chocolate. Yummmmm.....

5. Cucumbers - or, more specifically, cucumbers from our vegetable garden. I dont know how my farmer fiance does it but they're big, green and fresh...oh, and free!

6. Mothers group - This was the fourth week of meeting up with my mothers group ( a group of first time mums - our babies range in age from 8 to 16 weeks ) but its the first i've actually ' clicked with ' some of the other mums. I'm a little shy and it takes me a while to warm up to strangers, so it was nice to be able to have a little chat and not feel too self-concious about it this week.

7. Hitting the 8 week mark - that is, my son is now 8 weeks old and i havent broken him yet! He's also gone up a size in the clothing for the first time, so that was a nice little milestone to hit...

Comfort Food, Come Full Circle

So i've joined an exclusively Australian blog community called " Blog This! ", which is all about finding and sharing great Aussie blogs - and participating in blog post challenges. Basically an idea for a blog post is issued as a " challenge " and once you've completed your post on the topic hand, you link back to yourself on the Blog This! site and after an extensive find/read/vote, a winner is chosen. So good luck me! This weeks challenge reads thusly:



'Blog about your comfort food. What is it? Do you make it? How did you stumble upon it? Is it at your favourite restaurant? How does it make you feel ? Share a recipe, restaurant review or about the last time you ate it!'



To be quite honest with you, i didnt know that the concept of a " comfort " food existed until i became a regular viewer of reality tv. That is, it wasnt until every second episode of " Oprah " or " Dr Phil " mentioned comfort eating, or that " The Biggest Loser " exploded onto our screens with its cast of comfort eaters and comfort eating combatants ... well, before all that i just thought food was divided into foods you did like, and foods you didnt; foods you craved more than others and foods you wouldnt eat in a pink fit. But once the whole " comfort eating " concept, for better or worse, had been drummed into me i realised i've had a love affair with more than one comfort food throughout my life. Never more than one comfort food at a time though - that would be like cheating on your partner or lying to your Dad.



So where did i start ? Peanut butter. Or, more specifically, smooth peanut butter on white toast. It couldnt be the crunchy variety, and it couldnt be brown bread. Hell, it couldnt even be just 'bread ' - it had to be toasted. It happened in my teens - in the throes of a deep rooted depression ( which i had diagnosed yet, but thats another a story ) i would turn to the sweet, nutty, stick-to-the-roof-of-your-mouth goodness of humble peanut butter to make me feel better. To feel normal. I would come in from school and go straight to the bread bin, make me up some toast and slather it in peanut butter. I'd eat 5 or 6 pieces in one sitting and it would never fail to make me feel okay. Or full....

Fast forward a few years. I've finished high school, started medication, and am now working in a part-time retail job. I've given the humble peanut butter the flick. What's comforting me now? Tuna, avocado and lettuce sandwiches. I've upgraded from white bread to the far more complex multigrain, and have discovered the exotic, creamy delight that is avocado. I'd always enjoyed tuna sandwiches - but no brine, ok? - but the avocado just gave it that little something extra. I'd eat this same thing for lunch everyday, day in, day out. It was there when those pesky custmers were giving me hell and it was there when i was just so bored/tired/lazy i couldnt be bothered to make anything else. Tuna and avocado gave me that same sense of order and normalcy that peanut butter did - just in a so uch more grown up way.

A new adventure - now i'm living in the United States, working as an au pair. I'm on the opposite side of the world to everyone i know and love, and i've left the tuna sandwiches behind along with that stubborn depression. Where do i turn for comfort this time? This great little deli in the town where i live ( very originally called Towne Deli ) and their amazing chicken salad sandwiches. I eat so many of them that i no longer need to order them specifically, i just need to turn up and Roberto or Nathan or whomever i was behind the counter would say " The usual ? ". Yep - a chicken salad sandwich, lettuce, and tomato on a Portuguese roll. The chicken salad was comprised of diced chicken, finely chopped cucumber and this delicious mayonnaise who's ingredients were never revealed to me. It wasnt like anything i could get at home so i'm not quite sure how eased my homesickness, but somehow this chicken salad just " got " me. Thats what we all really want, right ?

Rewind to last year and a situation that practically guarantees i'm going to find a new food affair - i'm pregnant! I'm expecting to crave the cliche pickles-and-icecream combo but no - no crazy, far out, weird pregnancy cravings for me. Nope, just, well... devon. I'm kind of ashamed to admit that ( lets face it, devon is not exactly the rockstar of the deli meat world). I also had the tendency to exhale whole loaves of garlic bread in one go, but devon was the easiest, yummiest, bestest on the go snack during my pregnancy. A midwife tells me that craving salty, savoury foods like these mean i'm having a boy - and i do!

And now? My Flynn is 7 weeks old and where am i at? I'm back with my first real love - peanut butter. Its still the smooth kind only this time it has to be on multi grain toast. Its my breakfast staple and if i cant my beautiful boy to sleep or i'm pushed for time or he just wont for the love of God stop crying! - well sometimes its my lunch aswell.

My life my have changed forever, certain people and things may have come and gone, but i think peanut butter is here to stay.....

DD minus 25: More Yucky Medecine?!?

I am not ashamed to admit that i am completely and totally tuckered out as i write this. Hanging out with a 4 year old day has really taken it out of me, so god only knows what i'm going to be like in the first few weeks of having a newborn....

H, my 4 year old neice, is a very cool little person. She's not the kind of little kid thats prone to tantrums ( although when they do happen they can be a doozy! ) and she's happy to sit and watch tv for a while if her very pregnant aunty is a little tired. Even better, she came up with the great idea of playing doctor with me this afternoon - she the doctor and me the lady who has just had a baby ( wow - what an imagination... ). The game involved me lying on the lounge and her checking my heartbeat, blood pressue and throat with her little toy doctors kit, and making me take about 12 doses of yucky faux medecine. I also needed a few needles as did the baby, but the good news is after a few days bedrest in hospital, my faux baby and i are doing fine. This game lasted around an hour, which was plenty of time for me to recover some energy and keep on keeping on.

What else was fine was " Cloudy With A Chance Of Meatballs ". I'd read some good reviews and although kids movies are usually a gamble, this one paid off. There was enough laughs for little kids but the occasional joke that only the adults would pick up on; the animation was great; and the concept was easy enough for a 4 year old to understand but no so juvenile as to leave me bored. Basically, this crazy backyard scientist invents a machine that turns water molecules into food and through a slight mishap the machine gets launched into the sky - effectively feeding off the water in the clouds and making it rain food. Thats enough for little kids - its raining food, and giant food at that ? Hilarious! H decided that if she could make it rain food she would want big hamburgers; i was voting for giant icecream cones. Either way, thats enough post-film conversation to pronounce this one a winner.

And now, i'm thinking its time for a plateful of mango and then its off to bed. Oh, and also, our muffins ending up a winner also - i'd planned on banana but H had the idea of throwing in some gorgeous juicy cherries aswell. Mr Gil has had two and plans on taking with his lunch tomorrow, and my brother ( H's dad ) told her that they were really nice so..... so, yea, go team Amy and H!