Just Listen an Absolute Must Read

I don't review books very often on my blogs--maybe I should, though. I read an awful lot and some of it is okay, but some of it is life-changing. I've read a few such books in the last few months. Trust Agents by Brogan and Smith, Engage by Brian Solis, Networked Nonprofit by Kanter and Fine, to name a few. But this one is up there--Just Listen by Dr. Mark Goulston.
What attracted me to this book initially? Title. I don't listen well--I admit. My top strengths are activator and strategic--I don't listen well. Anyway--the book is fantastic. First off, Goulston trains hostage negotiators. Does that tell you something? The subtitle of this book is, "discover the secret to getting through to absolutely anyone." Anyone? Oh, come on now. But after reading the book, I can see how he can make that claim legitimately.

I knew I was in for a challenge when he said early on:

"Most people upshift when they want to get through to other people. They persuade. They encourage. They argue. They push. And in the process, they create resistance. When you use the techniques I offer, you'll do exactly the opposite--you'll listen, ask, mirror, and reflect back to people what you've heard...and the unexpected downshift will draw them to you."

I waded through the initial explanation of the three brains, the scientific stuff--and then I hit the chapter called, Move Yourself From "Oh F#@& to OK" where the scientific stuff started to make practical sense. I had an epiphany in that chapter. I realized what was tripping me up often in stressful communications was my inability to be able to move through that cycle quickly. Now, I am practicing.

The book is loaded with practical info based on scientific research and his umpteen years of training CEOs, police, lawyers, you name it... It really hit home with me. Learning to move people from "no" to "yes" is a skill we all need.

When you pick up the book, you'll want to read "the power of hmmmm" at least twice. Powerful stuff. Pick up a copy today. Good reading, and may we all become good listeners.